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Negotiation Strategy Series: 2 Building trust and managing emotions

By Professor Javier Marcos-Cuevas
3-2
 
10 essential engagement strategies.


 

 

Welcome to the second in a series of four articles on defining your negotiation strategy and enhancing your negotiation skills by Professor Javier Marcos.

 

In today's commercial business environment, effective negotiation demands the ability to regulate your emotions and the skill to build genuine trust when business relationships are interdependent. In this article, I explore ten powerful strategies for managing emotions and building trust in negotiations. These approaches can transform potentially contentious exchanges into productive partnerships.

 

Strategies for Managing Emotions

1. Label emotions

Acknowledging emotions – both yours and your counterpart's – creates space for more rational discussion. Rather than ignoring tension, naming it reduces its power to derail negotiations. For instance, when negotiating with a supplier who appears frustrated with your proposed pricing structure, instead of becoming defensive, try saying: "It seems like you're feeling concerned about the margins in our proposal". This simple acknowledgement often diffuses tension and opens dialogue about the underlying issues.

 

2. Avoid overreaction

Strategic negotiators sometimes deliberately provoke emotional responses to gain concessions. Recognising this tactic allows you to maintain composure. A potential client may say "Your proposal is frankly insulting compared to what your competitors are offering". Instead of responding defensively, you could consider responding with a statement like "I understand you're not satisfied with our current proposal. Let's set aside the characterisations and focus on which specific elements don't meet your expectations".

Avoiding overreaction requires you to recognise that negotiators sometimes deliberately use strong language or emotional displays to provoke you. The key is to respond to the substance rather than the emotional delivery, maintaining composure while redirecting the conversation to tangible issues. This disciplined approach prevents the escalation that often results in hasty, unfavourable concessions.

 

3. Assess angry displays

Not all displays of emotion are genuine. Learning to distinguish between calculated anger and genuine frustration helps you respond appropriately. For instance, during contract renewal talks, your counterpart suddenly becomes visibly angry about a standard clause that was previously accepted without issue. Rather than immediately offering concessions, assess whether this represents a genuine concern or a negotiation tactic by asking specific questions about their objections.

Assessing angry displays involves determining whether the other party's emotion is genuine or a calculated tactic. Effective negotiators recognise that anger is most persuasive when directed at the task rather than the person, perceived as justified, and delivered in a context of relative independence. Understanding these dynamics helps you respond strategically rather than reactively to emotional displays.

 

4. Use assertiveness strategically

The five-part assertion framework provides a structured way to express concerns without triggering defensive reactions by stating:

  1. What you like,
  2. What you don't like,
  3. What you want,
  4. What will happen if agreement is reached,
  5. What will happen otherwise.

Imagine you are negotiating delivery timelines with a manufacturing partner. Instead of simply demanding faster turnaround, use the framework:

"What I like about our partnership is your attention to quality. What concerns me is the proposed eight-week delivery timeline. What I'd like is a six-week timeline. If we can agree to this, we can commit to a larger order. If not, we'll need to split our order between multiple suppliers."

This approach balances firmness with respectfulness, presenting your position clearly while maintaining a collaborative tone. It transforms potential confrontations into problem-solving conversations.

 

5. Employ extended pauses

Silence is a powerful tool in negotiations. Strategic pauses give both parties time to reflect and often lead to better outcomes.

Think about a situation where, after presenting your proposal for a joint venture, the other party does not react. Resist the urge to fill any silence with additional concessions. Instead, remain comfortably quiet for 10-20 seconds, allowing your counterpart time to process the information and formulate a thoughtful response rather than a reactive one.

Extended pauses can serve you at several strategic points in negotiations:

  • After making an offer,
  • After receiving a counteroffer,
  • After asking an important question,
  • To encourage a deliberative mindset.

These deliberate silences of a few seconds slow the conversation's pace, allowing deeper consideration of proposals and preventing reactive responses. They create space for reflection that often leads to more creative solutions.

 

Strategies for Building Trust

6. Establish process transparency

Beginning negotiations with clarity about process creates psychological safety and sets expectations for all parties. For example, when starting negotiations for a complex software implementation project for instance, you might say:

"Today, I propose we first discuss our overarching goals, then identify our key requirements, explore potential solutions, and finally establish a framework for implementation. Does that approach work for you?"

This transparency reduces uncertainty and builds immediate rapport.

Establishing process transparency involves building positive initial rapport and clearly outlining how the negotiation will proceed before substantive discussions begin. This approach creates psychological safety by reducing uncertainty about what will happen next and demonstrates respect for the other party's need for clarity. It sets the stage for productive exchanges by ensuring both parties share expectations about the negotiation's structure and goals.

 

7. Reciprocal information sharing

Opening up about priorities and constraints encourages similar disclosures from your counterpart, creating fertile ground for value creation. Think about a situation where in a real estate negotiation, you say: "While price is important to us, we're particularly concerned about closing date flexibility and the property's condition report." This disclosure often prompts the seller to reveal their own priorities, perhaps that speed matters more than maximising the final price, creating opportunity for mutually beneficial terms.

 

8. Highlight shared interests

Identifying common ground helps frame the negotiation as a collaborative problem-solving exercise rather than a competition. The historic Camp David Accords between Egypt and Israel illustrate this principle perfectly. When mediators discovered both sides had compatible interests – Egypt wanted sovereignty over the Sinai Peninsula while Israel needed security – they crafted an agreement for Egypt to reclaim the territory as a demilitarised zone, satisfying both parties' core needs.

Highlighting shared interests involves identifying where both parties' goals align or complement each other, even when they appear initially opposed. This strategy reframes the negotiation as a collaborative problem-solving exercise with compatible objectives rather than a competition. By focusing on these areas of potential agreement, negotiators can build momentum and goodwill that helps address more challenging issues.

 

9. Demonstrate reliability and consistency

Following through on commitments, even small ones, builds credibility that supports larger agreements. During prolonged negotiations, for instance in a corporate merger, consistently providing promised information by agreed deadlines – even when the information might not be entirely favourable to your position – demonstrates trustworthiness that can sustain momentum through difficult discussion phases.

Triggering reliability and consistency requires being clear and upfront about your position and intentions, then meticulously following through on any promises or agreements made. This behavioural consistency builds predictability that allows the other party to engage more confidently in the negotiation process. It creates a positive cycle where reliability begets reliability, steadily increasing the level of trust between parties.

 

10. Problem-solving jointly

Addressing core human concerns, such as those identified by Fisher and Shapiro, is the cornerstone of connecting to others. These concerns include:

  • Appreciation (feeling valued),
  • Affiliation (connection to others),
  • Autonomy (freedom to make decisions),
  • Status (recognition of standing).

Addressing these needs creates conditions where collaborative problem-solving flourishes. For instance, when restructuring a long-term supplier relationship, acknowledging the supplier's industry expertise (status), expressing genuine appreciation for their past contributions, emphasising your continued partnership (affiliation), and giving them choices in how the new terms might be structured (autonomy) creates an environment where both parties can work together to find innovative solutions.

 

Applying These Strategies in Practice

These ten approaches are most effective when tailored to your specific negotiation context. In highly distributive (win-lose) negotiations, emotional management becomes crucial to prevent unfavourable concessions. In integrative (win-win) negotiations, trust-building strategies create opportunities to expand value for all parties.

Effective negotiation balances tactical skill with emotional intelligence and trust-building. The ten strategies outlined here provide a comprehensive framework for approaching even the most challenging negotiations.

Whether you're negotiating business contracts, resolving workplace conflicts, or engaging in high-stakes diplomatic discussions, these approaches can help transform potentially adversarial exchanges into productive partnerships that create sustainable value for all involved.

Remember that negotiation is fundamentally a human activity. By addressing both the emotional and substantive dimensions of your discussions, you can achieve better outcomes and stronger relationships that support future collaboration.

 

 

Cranfield’s Strategic Negotiation Programme

Ready to transform your negotiation outcomes?

The strategies outlined above represent just a glimpse of the comprehensive approach taught in the Cranfield Strategic Negotiation Programme. This immersive experience goes beyond theory, offering hands-on practice with professional behavioural experts, in realistic scenarios that challenge and refine your skills.

 

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Read the other articles in this series:

Negotiation Strategy Series: 1 Planning and preparation

Negotiation Strategy Series: 3 Navigating the ‘mind-field’

Negotiation Strategy Series: 4 Exchanging concessions and making agreements

 

Author

Javier Marcos - Professor of Strategic Sales and Negotiation, Cranfield School of Management

 

 


 

Tags: strategic negotiations, article, SNP

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